I made it a point to avoid today's meeting... dang, didn't think I was a coward. Its all part of the process I guess, but DBAG puede besar mi culo.

My main goal here is to let go of the ego. This has gotten me into trouble several times before. If I can't love myself, I can't love others. I don't know why I'm so self destructive. I wish it were different, but wishing is a fools game. Left a life that served me well; paid for everything, but drove me to hell. I liked it...

For those reading this, je suis désolé. I am hesitant to post anything that is going on inside my head, but that's part of the problem. I should continue to write, continue to bring others into my life, get this stuff out of me & trust in the world.

Posts will get better... in a dark place with a beautiful surrounding...